Are you looking forward to calling that hot chick you met last night? She did give you her number right? Go ahead, look through your pockets, I watched you put it in there. If only you could remember her name.
I heard a story about a guy once, who was given a fake number from a girl that didn’t have the balls to say no thank you when he asked for it. I’m going to tell it to you now, it kinda gets me off.
He gets home from work and decides to call her. When she picks up, he jumps right in. “I wish I had followed you home last night.” “Your hot ass just drove me wild, I want to bend you over and fuck you so hard.” He listened for a response, but the line was silent.
“Ohhh, you’re going to play shy girl with me? Ok, I like to have to work for it. Go ahead, I’ll tell you exactly what I’m going to do to you.” He went on and on about how he was going to chase her up the stairs and tear off all her clothes.
How, when all of her clothes were off he was going to pour baby oil all over her. He would take his own clothes off and slip and slide all over the floor, with her on top. At one point, the phone sex turned into a dining experience.
As she lay upon the floor, he got cupcakes and whipped cream and placed them all over her slick body. Finally, he finished off his story with getting her off by eating her out.
He was catching his breath and waiting for her to say something when a scratchy voice came over the line. “Young man, I have never heard anyone in my 90 years be so filthy.”
Actually that guy was me, so watch out for fake numbers handed out at bars and use a free chatline instead.
